Lefties vs. Righties Tournament 2001

By Gray Ransom

As they drove to the bowling center, they could see that the yellow forsythia bushes were in bloom. The trees looked fuzzy as their buds broke forth from their winter protective coverings. The sun was shining, and the day held the promise of another great Lefties vs. Righties Tournament. Yes, today, by sundown, the answer would be known—the answer to the question of which hand would hold bragging rights for the forthcoming 12 months.

In the past, each hand had won once, and now the tiebreaker match was scheduled for this day. The Internet had been burring up with challenges and boasts from both sides. The captain of the Righties—eh, that, of course, would be the one and only Ducky Root—had sent the final paper via the Internet. In that paper, he questioned the character of the Lefties team. The Lefties, still uncomfortable from last year's last frame loss, countered by having three (that is, 3…3…3) captains. Those chosen were Jim Frey, Jim Butcher, and Margaret Ransom. Those captains had promised to bring every Lefty to the tournament—and they did just that.

As it turned out, there were 11 Lefties pacing the concourse of Bowl America Burke an hour before the starting bell. Ducky Root managed to gather 12 Righties around him. Yep, 23 members of the Thursday Commercial League (some 25 percent) were on hand to support their arm by their presence and skill.

After all the knee braces, wrist devices, and tape adjustments to the thumbholes were in place, the lanes were set for score. The tournament got underway with the captain of the Righties, Ducky R., getting set and throwing a big six count on the first ball. Ripples of laughter were heard from the Lefties as their three captains took the lanes. Captains Jim F. countered with a nine count, Margaret R. rolled a nine count, and Jim B. produced a nine count. Ducky R. finished the frame with a spare. However, both Jim F. and Margaret R. missed, and only Jim B. was able to keep up with Ducky R.

I think it was said that with all the pins Ducky R. had left standing, it was easier to hit that big pile than a single pin. Ducky R. said he now had them where he wanted them.

In the second frame, Ducky R. struck as did both Margaret R. and Jim B. But Jim F. continued to look for his "A" game as he threw an eight count and then proceeded to miss those two pins as well.

As the first game progressed, the first Righty to get a strike was Drew H. The first Lefty to strike was Earnie B. The first Righty to throw a split (too much pressure?) was Louie E., with the Lefty Sean L. falling to the same pressure. Neither one converted their split.

The first real "sloppy" strike, of course, came from a Lefty, Jim A. He had a sweeper pin take out the potential 6-8 split. The first one to "run out a strike" was Earnie B. As he stepped in front of the captain of the Righties, I did not hear what Ducky R. said to Earnie B., but I did hear a captain of the Lefties, Jim B., tell Ducky R. to leave his bowlers alone.

Jim F., who had the first two frames open, began to strike and rang up a four-bagger before he left a 7-pin and then missed it. Goodness, he would have had a great game if he could have ever made a spare. Other Lefties to get a string going in the first game were Bob A. (a five-bagger) and Bobby C. (a four-bagger). There were no strings recorded for any of the Righties, as all of them continued to hunt for a line to the pocket.

Dawn M. was seen leaving the building to get some new equipment from her car. She said she needed a different spare ball (and she sure did). Righty Steve L. did manage to beat the Lefties team captain Jim B. by one pin in the first game. At the end of the first game, the Lefties had pulled ahead of the Righties by a score of 8 to 4.

The paring for the second game was drawn, and several matchups were noted. Father, Steve L. was paired against his son, Lefty Sean L. The son was seen wiping his face several times during the match. (Several times? I think he went through several towels during that match.) I heard the son say that he thought his pocket was getting smaller and smaller as the match progressed. The match came down to the 10th frame when the son posted an eight count, spare, and then 10 in the pit. The father stood up, confident as ever, and proceeded to throw a seven-count split, and only picked up two of the remaining pins. The son won the match, 207 to 195. All Ducky could do was ring his hands and worry.

The man for the Lefties—Scott G.—drew the Righty who claims to throw a "man’s ball": Drew H. By the fifth frame, both were on a string, but Drew H. was ahead in count by two pins. Drew was seen purchasing his third rosin bag of the match as he stood up in the eighth frame and opened. Scott G. jumped up from the table and could be seen smiling. But that smile turned to a frown as he was only able to throw a spare in that same frame.

The match was decided in the 10th frame as Drew H. threw a nine count, spare, and then showed the pressure of the match by throwing a seven count. Of course, given any opening at all in a match, Scott G. (true to form and reputation) threw a strike, another strike, and a third strike for the win. The score was 222 to 211. It really was Drew H.'s game to win, but youth was no match for experience in this match.

Perhaps next year?

The next match had a captain of the Lefties, Jim F., going against the captain of the Righties, Ducky R. This game really was a picture of the fate that the Righties experienced all day: The game was just close enough for Ducky R. to have a chance, but he did not knock down enough pins to win. Jim F. prevailed by a score of 226 to 202. Righty Greg B. lost to Lefty Bobby C. by a score of 213 to 211 and then proceeded to take his frustration out on the scoring table. Greg!

At the break, the Lefties had a commanding lead of 16 wins to 8 wins for the Righties.

Thanks to Danny and his very capable assistant, the tournament bowlers were treated to pizza at the break.

As the third games progressed, it was obvious that all of the bowlers ate too much. Also, Righty Brian D.'s friend arrived, and, eh, began to scratch his back. I really think she was working for the Lefties, as after her arrival, Brian, who had 102 in the fifth, went from a strike in the fifth to a spare in the sixth to an open (no split) in the seventh and lost his match against that Lefty Bob A. by a score of 182 to 177.

Brian, where did your concentration go?

The score at the conclusion of the third round: Lefties, 22 wins ... Righties, 14 wins.

Ducky R. did what he could to rally his troops, but it was too little, too late. Jaime C. did take care of Jim A. (hero from last year) by a score of 224 to 220. Jaime C. was on a three-bagger and then hung a 6-pin. Jim A. was not up to taking the lead and folded. Jaime C. was heard to say something to the effect of, Leave it to a woman to do all of the work.

I am not sure what was being said during the match between Margaret R. and Doug P., but Margaret R. won by a score of 245 to 215, and her victory cry (real loud, too) was, "Now who is the wusses?"

After the final cycle of pins had taken place, the Lefties were the owners of the bragging rights for the year. Final score: Lefties, 30 … Righties, 18. As the balls were being put away, coats being downed, it was heard that painful cry of the Righties, "Wait until next year!"

8,505 total pins / 42 games / 202.5 team average.

9,110 total pins / 48 games / 189.8 team average

Congratulations to all of the Lefties!

(Thanks again to Danny and his staff for the use of the house and for the pizzas.)